Racist things other white people say to me

(Because, you see, being white makes you part of the secret non-PC club, whether you want to be or not)

I’m white. That means other white people feel comfortable telling me their racist thoughts, assuming same race = same opinions. Here’s the ones that stand out.

Man my parents’ age: I grew up during segregation but I had black friends then, and they would have told me if they thought segregation was a problem.

No. No they would not have. I can’t believe I even have to say this.
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Doctor, knowing I’m from NY: I went to NYC and had a great time, but the cabs scared me. Cab drivers whispering who knows what in other languages, you know? Car service is more expensive, but clearly worth it.

No. Taking cabs in NYC is normal. People have accents. Get over it. If they’re whispering, (and they’re probably not because who are they talking to while driving?) it’s just to keep their voice down so it doesn’t bother you, their customer. No one’s secretly plotting against you in other languages while taking you to your destination.

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Hair stylist: (out of nowhere) Black people’s hair is so much harder to cut, it’s just so different.

Uh, what? Why are you telling me this? You’ve clearly learned that cutting/styling my curly white-person hair is different from cutting/styling wavy hair is different from cutting/styling straight hair (something plenty of other stylists shockingly don’t seem to comprehend, so you’re already ahead), so there’s no reason learning to cut and style the rest of the range of human hair textures should be such an alien concept. I mean, you only deal with hair for a living; silly me for expecting you to know how to deal with hair!
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Kids from middle school in NC: I remember the first time I saw a black person. It happened like this…

Twice! Twice I’ve heard this story! And they were expecting me to share my own account here? What the heck NC?! Is this a common narrative?! How in the world are there kids there who never saw black people until they were old enough to remember it and have is be jarring enough to leave an impression!? Did their parents never let them watch TV? Go outside?! These were kids from towns and cities, not isolated areas! Did their parents never take them to the store? How is this possible?!

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Bonus round! Religious bigotry:

At work, woman giving us her contact information for our educational programming: My children are in American Heritage Girls. They’re like Girl Scouts, but GS has “God” as optional in the Girl Scout Promise, so it’s not welcoming to Christians.

Uuuggghhhhh.